People are obsessed with using the ‘Cinderella rule’ in the bedroom.
In a recent episode of the podcast Just Between Us, host Alice Giddings and co-host Diana Vickers spoke with a caller named Mia, who opened up about how exhaustion was impacting her s** life.
“I live with people who require a lot of attention, and it’s very consuming,” Mia explained.
“I don’t have the time or mental ability. I work very long hours and struggle to switch from super sleepy to s**ual.”
Mia’s situation is familiar to many, particularly women who often bear the brunt of unpaid caregiving, household duties, and emotional labor, all while managing careers.
By the time evening rolls around, desire can feel like an afterthought.
Giddings offered a solution she’s adopted herself: the ‘Cinderella rule.’
The idea is simple: set a clear cutoff time for when intimacy must begin, after which it’s off the table.
For Giddings, that limit is 10:30 p.m., with 10:10 p.m. being the latest acceptable start time, based on the average British s**ual encounter lasting approximately 23 minutes and 45 seconds.
Scheduled s** might not sound particularly romantic at first, but for many couples, it can be a surprisingly effective way to maintain intimacy, especially when life gets overwhelmingly busy.
What makes the ‘Cinderella rule’ work is that it’s not about rigid scheduling, but creating a shared understanding.
Throughout the evening, partners can give each other subtle cues that s** is on the table while also acknowledging the agreed-upon limit.
This avoids pressure and disappointment, while still preserving anticipation and spontaneity.
Giddings noted that while she and her partner enjoy spur-of-the-moment intimacy, their lives often make that difficult.
Scheduled windows have become a way to stay physically connected without added stress.
For Mia, the recommendation was to adjust her routine slightly, keeping the emotional connection she shares with her partner during midday coffee breaks, but perhaps shifting one or two of those moments to a more private setting.
“Remembering to find these moments of connection in the mundane, where we can flirt a little if we pass each other in the kitchen, would make it so much easier to switch your mindset and mood,” Mia said.
Some women even get in the mood using techniques like ‘p*** dosing’ – listening to short audio clips of erotic content during daily chores or commutes to build anticipation gradually.
Giddings admitted she’s tried this herself and found it effective.
And for those who still feel tired when the time comes, low-effort positions like spooning or lying side-by-side can make intimacy feel relaxed, rather than like an Olympic sport.
Ultimately, the key is working with (not against) the realities of everyday life to keep the flame alive.
