It has been two years since the passing of the iconic actress and singer Doris Day, who died at the age of 97. She was celebrated as one of the most prominent stars of Hollywood’s Golden Age.
As well as appearing in almost 30 movies, she released more than 650 songs between 1947 and 1967 and received many awards for her dedication to music and movies including the Presidential Medal of Freedom.
The beloved actress and singer passed away in 2019; however, a close friend recently disclosed that she preferred not to have a funeral, memorial service, or grave marker.
But why? Let’s find out.
There are numerous reasons to admire Doris Day: her exceptional talent, her passion for animal welfare, and her genuine humility.
Throughout her illustrious 50-year career, Doris garnered immense affection and respect for her contributions to film. She rose to prominence with memorable performances in classics such as Pillow Talk, Love Me or Leave Me, and The Man Who Knew Too Much.
At the age of 97, Doris had been married four times and had one child. Her son, Terry Mulcher, whom she had with her first husband Al Jorden, passed away in 2004 due to melanoma.
In addition to her cinematic achievements, Day was a dedicated advocate for animal rights. She was known for her compassion and commitment to giving a voice to those who could not speak for themselves.
Doris was also a Grammy-winning singer.
Her songs “Sentimental Journey,” “Secret Love,” and “Que Sera Sera” were all honored with induction into the Grammy Hall of Fame. Additionally, her dedication to animal welfare led to the establishment of the Doris Day Animal Foundation.
In 2019, Doris Day passed away at her residence in Carmel Valley, California, following complications from pneumonia. Her death was announced by the Doris Day Animal Foundation, which stated that, in accordance with her wishes, there would be no funeral services, grave marker, or public memorials.
Instead, she was cremated, and her ashes were scattered.
As noted by her close friend and manager Bob Bashara, she preferred not to engage in discussions about a funeral, as she found the topic of death to be particularly challenging.
And there was a genuine reason for her final wishes.
“She didn’t like death, and she couldn’t be with her animals if they had to be put down. She had difficulty accepting death,” he said in a 2019 interview with People.
“I’d say we need to provide for her dogs [after she died], and she’d say, ‘I don’t want to think about it’ and she said, ‘Well, you just take care of them,’” recalls Bashara.
At the time her will was drafted, she had multiple dogs and wished to ensure their well-being. She preferred not to discuss the topic of their passing.
From the early 1970s, Day became a passionate advocate for animal rights, opposing the use of fur and establishing the Doris Day Animal Foundation.
In 2020, she auctioned over 1,000 of her belongings, generating $3 million for the cause. Additionally, she played a significant role in founding a Horse Rescue and Adoption Center in Texas, dedicated to assisting abused and neglected horses.
Raised in the Catholic faith, Day later practiced Christian Science after her marriage to producer Martin Melcher.
Her only child, Terrence “Terry” Paul Jorden, was born during her first marriage to trombonist Al Jorden, whom she met at the age of 16. Jorden subsequently adopted the name Terrence Paul Melcher after being adopted by Day’s third husband, film producer Martin Melcher.
Doris Day distanced herself from organized religion following the death of Melcher in 1968, as stated by Bashara to People, yet she continued to identify as “a spiritual person.”
“She had faith in God and believed her voice was a divine gift,” he remarked. “She often expressed, ‘God gave me a voice, and I simply used it.’”
Day stepped away from acting in the early 1970s but made a return for two television series. In 1985, she hosted her own talk show, “Doris Day’s Best Friends,” on the Christian Broadcasting Network, which aired for one year.
Bashara, her friend and manager, remains uncertain about Day’s hesitance to hold a funeral, suggesting, “I believe it was due to her very shy nature.”
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He stated that Day was aware of her fans’ affection for her, as evidenced by the letters she received, yet she could never comprehend the extent of that admiration.
“She never allowed her fame to influence her identity; she remained the same little girl from Cincinnati, exceptionally talented, who ventured into the world to pursue her passions, regardless of her own reservations,” he remarked.
Her remains were cremated, and her ashes were scattered.
Her estate was donated to charity.
We all have to come to terms with death in our own way and everyone’s wishes must be respected.
This legendary actress and singer will forever be loved and remembered. Rest in peace Doris Day. Please share.
