He was raised by his 15-year-old mother, who was later tragically murdered in a case that left police baffled for years.
This could have shattered him – but instead, this star has built an impressive career in Hollywood and has even been recognized as one of TV’s “Ten Sexiest Men.”
On October 26, 1961, in Waterbury, Connecticut, a future Hollywood heartthrob was born. His parents were teenage Catholics: Diane, an Italian-American just 15, and Richard, an Irish-American aged 17. The boy was named Mark.
Unfortunately, his parents separated before Mark turned two. By the time he was five, he had already lost his mother. Diane was shot in the head in February 1967, and although our star didn’t witness the shooting, he was a key witness. At that moment, Mark had been thrown out of the house by his mother’s boyfriend, a known gangster and heroin addict — just seconds before the gunfire erupted.
Police and paramedics hurried to the scene, and Diane was taken out on a stretcher with a fatal gunshot wound to her heavily bandaged head. For many years, her death was officially classified as an accidental shooting, but that narrative has changed in recent years, uncovering shocking new information.
“I’m not pleased that all this happened to me, but I’ve learned from it,” he once stated.
After their mother’s murder, the future Hollywood star and his sister moved in with their maternal grandmother, Avis, in Waterbury, Connecticut. Waterbury was a rough, working-class area, and he remembers that his family was one of the few white families living there.
As a teenager, he often felt out of place and awkward, even making jokes about his “Dorothy Hamill hairdo.” To boost his confidence, he began to imitate his acting idols, like Marlon Brando and Humphrey Bogart, picking up their styles and mannerisms.
On the other hand, his father was leading a completely different lifestyle, managing the West Fourth Street Saloon in Greenwich Village, New York City.
“Dad was basically a young bachelor, around 21 or 22, just trying to figure things out,” the actor shared in an interview with Irish America. “It made more sense for my sister and me to stay with our grandmother instead of going with Dad.”
During his teenage years, Mark frequently worked at his father’s bar, helping by serving drinks and breaking up fights. By that time, his dad, Richard, was known to the locals as “Mac” at the West 4th Street Saloon in Greenwich Village. Starting at the age of 13, he began spending more time with his father, initially as a busboy, then as a waiter, and eventually as a bartender.
“I was not big. I’ve been punched out many, many times,” the actor recounted to Movieline magazine in 2000.
For a period, Mark even lived in an apartment with his dad, absorbing the atmosphere, sounds, and characters of the bar, gaining firsthand experience about life behind the counter.
The actor recalls that he and his father had more of a brotherly relationship than a typical father-son dynamic, which made sense since his dad was only 17 years older than him. They had a lot of fun together — maybe too much — filled with late nights, comings and goings, and older women.
Eventually, his dad thought it was time for Dylan to get his own place. Not long after, he was ready to start a new chapter in his life: his acting career.
His dad’s third wife changed everything.
When Mark turned 15, he got a new stepmom. His father’s third wife, the well-known playwright Eve Ensler, would alter the path of his career. She recognized something in her stepson that made her believe Mark had real talent as an actor.
When Eve suggested that he should try acting too, it just made sense to him. He remembered serving famous actors like John Belushi, William Hurt, and Ray Sharkey, who frequently visited the bar where he worked. Mark thought, “Wow, what a life.”
He informed his dad that he was leaving the bar scene behind.
“My dad was always supportive; he never questioned my decision,” he recalled. “He always had faith in me, and he just said, ‘Go for it.’
Mark quickly got a part in one of his stepmom’s Off-Broadway plays. His dad helped him financially while he attended Fordham University, where he studied acting.
Later, he joined the renowned Neighborhood Playhouse, taking part in many productions, including one alongside Joanne Woodward. His performance in Neil Simon’s play Biloxi Blues caught the eye of a casting agent for Hamburger Hill, which kicked off his professional career.
The sad truth behind the name change.
Throughout the years, Mark has often spoken highly of his stepmom, and it’s evident they had a very strong connection — so strong that she not only impacted his career but also the name he would eventually be known by.
During his journey, S.A.G. regulations made Mark change his professional name. He picked Dylan, partly to honor the Welsh poet Dylan Thomas, but also due to a personal family story that left a significant impact.
“My dad was expecting a baby with my stepmom and they were going to name him Dylan,” he shares. “But there was a miscarriage, so the name sort of came to me.”
It was a name that came from both grief and affection, a symbol of his strong bond with the woman who influenced so much of his life. Since then, the world has recognized him as Dylan McDermott. Yes, we’re referring to the star of Law & Order: Organized Crime, who has made a remarkable career in Hollywood.
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His filmography includes big titles like Olympus Has Fallen, American Horror Story, and Steel Magnolias. He also earned a Golden Globe in 1999 for his performance in the TV drama The Practice.
Along with Emmy nominations and a Golden Globe win, Dylan has been acknowledged as one of TV’s “Ten Sexiest Men,” according to People magazine.
Wife and kids
Regarding his personal life, the American Horror Story star married actress Shiva Rose in 1995 after they met in a coffee shop, and he reportedly fell for her right away. Interestingly, Rose once mentioned to People magazine that when she first spotted the “handsome actor,” she wasn’t interested at all.
But once he started talking, she realized he was more than just good looks—he was poetic and articulate, and she found herself captivated.
The couple welcomed two daughters, Colette and Charlotte. Charlotte was born in 2005, while her older sister Colette came into the world nine years earlier, in 1996. After 12 years of marriage, the Practice star filed for divorce in 2008, citing irreconcilable differences. Court papers showed that their marriage had been under strain for a while, with the couple having been separated for a year before the filing.
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Dylan McDermott, who has been sober since 1984 after battling alcoholism, started dating his Stalker co-star Maggie Q. In 2017, they mentioned that they weren’t rushing into a formal wedding. However, after being engaged for four years, they announced their breakup in February 2019.
Despite having a successful career, Dylan McDermott has faced personal struggles. The heartbreaking story of his mother, Diane, has haunted him for many years.
Unraveling the mystery of his mother’s death
Diane passed away on February 9, 1967, when Dylan was only five years old, and for a long time, the details surrounding her death were unclear.
In 2011, while attending a fundraiser in Waterbury, Dylan spoke with Mayor Neil O’Leary and Police Superintendent Michael Gugliotti about the cold case. He raised concerns about the investigation, and it was found that many original files were either lost or missing, making it harder to find the truth.
Diane was right-handed, but the gunshot wound was on the left side of her head. At the time, she was dating a low-level mobster named John Sponza, who had ties to law enforcement and might have been an informant, which connected him to the case.
Evidence showed that both Diane and young Dylan had been abused by Sponza. Dylan “clearly remembers” several instances where Sponza threatened him with a gun, telling him, “Shut up and get out of here,” as reported by Gugliotti.
Police Superintendent Michael Gugliotti was shocked by how much abuse the family had suffered.
”Sponza [told] the police that night that he rarely, if ever, had arguments, yet everyone we spoke to, including Dylan, who was just five at the time, recalled very violent and vicious arguments,” Gugliotti stated.Dylan McDermott, who has been sober since 1984 after battling alcoholism, started dating his Stalker co-star Maggie Q. In 2017, they mentioned that they weren’t rushing into a formal wedding. However, after being engaged for four years, they announced their breakup in February 2019.
Despite having a successful career, Dylan McDermott has faced personal struggles. The heartbreaking story of his mother, Diane, has haunted him for many years.
Unraveling the mystery of his mother’s death
Diane passed away on February 9, 1967, when Dylan was only five years old, and for a long time, the details surrounding her death were unclear.
In 2011, while attending a fundraiser in Waterbury, Dylan spoke with Mayor Neil O’Leary and Police Superintendent Michael Gugliotti about the cold case. He raised concerns about the investigation, and it was found that many original files were either lost or missing, making it harder to find the truth.
Diane was right-handed, but the gunshot wound was on the left side of her head. At the time, she was dating a low-level mobster named John Sponza, who had ties to law enforcement and might have been an informant, which connected him to the case.
Evidence showed that both Diane and young Dylan had been abused by Sponza. Dylan “clearly remembers” several instances where Sponza threatened him with a gun, telling him, “Shut up and get out of here,” as reported by Gugliotti.
Police Superintendent Michael Gugliotti was shocked by how much abuse the family had suffered.
”Sponza [told] the police that night that he rarely, if ever, had arguments, yet everyone we spoke to, including Dylan, who was just five at the time, recalled very violent and vicious arguments,” Gugliotti stated.
Autopsy records later showed that the gun discovered near Diane’s body was too small to have inflicted the fatal injury.
Never faced justice
The police eventually changed the classification of her death to murder and determined that Sponza should have been charged, not just for Diane’s death but also for two other unsolved murders. Sponza never faced justice; in 1972, his bullet-riddled body was discovered in the trunk of a car in Waltham, Massachusetts.
Dylan’s sister, Robin Herrera, was just seven months old when their mother passed away, so she doesn’t have the same clear memories of the tragedy.
She expressed, “I’m glad to know my mother wasn’t mentally ill or depressed. Someone took her from us; she didn’t leave us.”
Dylan himself has mostly kept quiet about the case. He told the police that he buried the memories deep to survive and succeed in his career.
“He said, ‘To survive and get to where I am today, I had to bury that moment in my life deep within myself,” Gugliotti shared.
How it shaped him
For Dylan McDermott, losing his mother had a deep impact on him.
“When you lose a parent at a young age, it toughens you for life,” he said in 2000. “I have good memories of my mother. Losing a mother so early is all you have.”
“There were whole parts of my childhood that I wouldn’t wish on anyone, but for me as an artist, if I can use those experiences in a positive and constructive way, if I can keep my mother’s memory alive in my work, then that’s a good thing,” Dylan stated.
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I’ve always looked up to Mr. McDermott, and I sincerely hope the renewed investigation into his mother’s death has brought him some peace. It’s incredible that he never gave up — and that he was ultimately the one who uncovered the truth. This is something the police should have resolved many years ago!
Thank you, Dylan, for all the unforgettable moments you’ve given us on screen and for sharing your challenging journey with such openness. We look forward to seeing much more of you.
